Personal Power

Personal power and personal energy have a direct correlation. When we give away one, we give away the other. We stop growing, we wither, we become off-path (if you understand numerology you’ll have a better understanding of what I truly men by “off-path”). This can happen for many reasons, which typically end up feeding off of each other. But the result is the same regardless of the methodology used to get there.

Self-esteem, addiction, excessive need to conform and or please (which can be related to self-esteem, but there are also ties to not analytically examining tradition here that can become relevant), are just some of the gamut. Know that this writing uses the underlying assumption that we are energetic beings in manifest form, it assumes your awareness that we possess energy that can be gained or lost based on our life choices. It also assumes an understanding that our physical body is matter with the ability to integrate this energy in a beautiful, Divine, and seamless way.

To give you some personal backlog, I had lost a huge percentage of my personal energy and understand the course to get it back. I might as well have been dead, now, I’m full of fight, of life, and passion. I am quick to draw personal boundaries, to protect my own needs, my spirit, my time. I did not use to be able to do this. I also gave a lot of my personal power away to addiction many years ago, but when I moved away from that I did not realize that I didn’t have the skill sets and habits to do things out of discipline, things that take time to come to fruition, which is where a lot of our personal power also comes from.

Think of it this way, picture your personal power as a currency with the Universe, picture it glowing in your hand, all around you, in you, part of your every oscillating atom. Every time you make a decision that lessons you, you hand some over. And your Light grows smaller. Now, I do not mean to ignore the psychology that is also at play here, but that is just the manifest of what is happening energetically, so stay with me.

Every time you say yes when you feel no, every time you don’t fight for your own needs, every time you use substance to cope, you die inside. Piece by piece. Remember that Self Love is not the same thing as being selfish, so don’t feel badly to care for yourself! You deserve it. Or you wouldn’t exist. And additionally, if you are on a path of service, you cannot give from an empty cup (no one can). I know this is cliché, but you must overflow that Light.

I think I need to mention that another underlying assumption here is that we have each come here to honor and love our own authenticity. You did not come here to be someone else’s version of you. You did not come here to fulfill a role, play a part, or dilute yourself. For anyone. Ever. Our progress and the ascension of humanity depend on everyone realizing this. You are unique. You are of value. Just the way you are. You have gifts that only you possess, but you have to find them by finding what is authentic. And separating that from what is not.

Although we are all one and connected, we are different points, unique points, of that blanket reflection. Did you know I can be fashionably fabulous and spiritual? Without having to give up either of those aspects of self. I can embrace by animalistic side and appreciate the humanity found in civility, wrapped in chiffon. Did you know that you don’t have to follow traditions of your grandparents that you don’t believe in? Did you know that women don’t have to be mothers if that isn’t your calling? How did your concepts of masculinity come to be? You don’t have to be anything. Just you. No more, but no less!

But first, you must question every belief and thought you have. Where did they come from? How much of your belief system has come from analytical thought and how much has come from conditioning? How much is fear based? Did you start to question everything but end up simply doing the opposite of what you knew, instead of holding onto things that may actually have been of value? How many decisions do you make that are for others, but that hurt your truth? Well, if I did that, what would my parents think? My husband? My children? The proverbial “they”? How about what you think? What you feel? Oh, wait! Do you think that you can ____? Do you think you deserve ____? Do you think that you matter in a very real way? Do you feel worthy? I didn’t.

Then something in me changed. I joke and crassly tell friends that my “give a f*** broke,” a couple of years back. And I woke up. And have continued to do so since. What this really means is that I gained Self Love, and the ability to draw boundaries without apology. I would no longer give away parts of myself, my Light, and my happiness for anyone. And I was angry at what I had allowed. Sometimes I still am, but I use that anger as a guide and work every day on filling myself back up in order to move past that. I delve deeper into the things that matter to me; science, politics, pure mathematics, philosophy, writing etc. I make decisions that require work, discipline and do things that can only be achieved over long periods of time.

I lost my teen years to addiction because my little empath self couldn’t handle the pain of the world. Then I lost the better part of the following decade to relationships with addicts, because everyone else mattered more than me. But what I really lost time to was my lack of inner strength and Self Love. Self-Love is Divine Love. However, this was part of my lesson in the manifest and I don’t harbor regret. I look at life the way I do now only because of what I’ve been through. Never regret your journey. But for Heaven’s sake, be an active part in it! You are the captain of your ship, and when you leave this place, you will do so alone, so honor yourself as your best friend. Learn to enjoy alone time! This is your space to love you. Don’t be afraid to look yourself in the eye and say, we’ve got this! Even when you feel like you’re losing fortitude. Especially when you feel like you’re losing fortitude. And as you rebuild you, your personal power will return, from a psychological standpoint, and with it, your personal energy.

To follow are some tips and tricks for when you have an acute, drastic drop in energy and need a quick recover, so that you can pull yourself back up to baseline and continue doing the real work. Feeling physically weak and having chest pain, that has no medical reasoning, can be tell-tale sign of this. Your heart center is depleted! Now, let me include as a disclaimer here not to take this to the level of ridiculous, if you are falling down with chest pain and losing consciousness, call 911. What I’m talking about is very different, it can almost seem like anxiety, almost.

One option is to do a mediation where you picture yourself filling with Light, growing brighter and brighter as you honor your truth, each time you cast away a limiting idea of self judgement picture that Light growing. You can choose to picture these judgments as rocks that you toss from inside, and become lighter and lighter as you grow brighter.

Another simple one is to shower! Or bathe. I prefer to kneel under the water in my shower, candles and incense burning, with no fake light (that’s light bulb based light). There is a Divine, cleansing aspect to water. There are a lot of original truths found in religion, it’s just hard to find them beneath the man-made doctrine sometimes. What other things work for you? What fills you? Maybe it’s art, I am not an artist, although I have a deep appreciation for it. Remember, there are universal tricks, but the whole point is what works for you, for your authenticity. Follow your higher self to find these things.

Nature can refill you too (The Celestine Prophecy is my number one book recommendation if this is speaking to your highest self-right now). The older the trees, the more restorative. The ocean can wash most anything away. But you’re just buying yourself time with these things if you’re using them as a quick fix. It’s the little decisions you make in between these saviors that really matters. The devil is in the details.

Music! The Universe is a construct of math and music. These vibrations are the fabric of everything. Change the theme song to your life when need to, let it course through you, body and soul. Don’t use it to feed into negativity. Make a positive choice, even when it’s hard. Something else that can be difficult when we are depleted, but is quid essential, is to get rid of the clutter. This is one of the most basic concepts of Feng Shui. Get up and clean up! As is above so is below, most of us know that. But what is just as true is, as is outward so is inward.

Remaining clutter free goes back to something I have addressed a couple of times so far, the need for self-discipline to retain, and or regain, personal power. Cultivating the life of your dreams takes time and work. It’s meant to be cultivation, you weren’t given magic beans for a reason. You’d miss the lesson and the growth. When you cultivate your life with discipline, order, love, and non-judgment, you open yourself up and allow the Universe to cultivate the best you.

Now remember though, this doesn’t mean there’s something you must be, or must labor towards, in order to be enough. However, the trouble lies in the fact that many people who realize this often disregard personal discipline, and that will never benefit you, or anyone else. Anything worth anything typically takes considerable time, so put the time in, don’t waiver. And remember, if you’re rebuilding, although there might be points that you’ll see dramatic change quickly, the overall correction of a thing can’t be in the blink of an eye if it took you fifteen years to arrive at where and who you are now.

There are many ways we give our personal power away. Some happen in a moment, others take time. But no matter what, you can get it back, you can start today. Make decisions that honor your authenticity, recognize when you are making fear based decisions and make a more self-loving choice, analyze your values to make sure you don’t live in ways that are for someone else and are killing your essence over time, replenish when you’re trained, and follow your intuition. It’s time to bet on you, on the real you. As my mom use to quote to me, “you can learn to fly, on the way down.”